Wednesday, September 20, 2017

Let's Talk About Talking

Working as a Resident Assistant at UNH, I have had to have some uncomfortable conversations. There have been times that I have had to address conduct issues or resident conflicts. Frequently, I feel like the bearer of bad news. Although these conversations are one of my least favorite parts of the job, they are an important part nonetheless. Residents have problems and I am their go-to person to address it. This can be tough, but has also taught me a lot of valuable skills in conflict management and intervention. Today in class, we were discussing the tension between nurses, physicians and administration that run pretty typical across different organizations. During this talk as a class, we were talking about what we could say to an agitated physician to help them feel heard and validated. After class I began to mull over this issue. Although what you say is important, I feel like how you say it is just as essential. I have learned this during my RA training that simple things like body language and tone of voice can completely change the course of a conversation.  This makes me think of one of my favorite quotes by Maya Angelou, “At the end of the day people won’t remember what you said or did, they will remember how you made them feel.” Although Angelou wasn’t directly speaking to the healthcare administrator and physician dynamic, her words still hold a lot of value when we reflect on them. I hope that in my future career I am able to hold meetings where disgruntled staff members feel like their voice is heard. Although I may not always be able to give them the answer they want, I hope that I can make them feel like an important part of the organization and that I won’t just file their complaint away after the meeting is done and never think of it again. A big part of this is listening and trying my best to find solutions, whether that be through compromise or seeking out change. My goal in doing this is to create stronger relationships with employees in all areas of the future organization that I work for.

6 comments:

  1. I learned so much about leadership from being an RA - I'm glad you are having that experience.

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  2. Same here; the several years I spent as an RA (in the jock dorm, of all places) taught me invaluable people skills. You also hit the nail on the head about people potentially forgetting what you said, but remembering how you made them feel.

    An extremely important skill emphasized by my high school creative writing instructor: "take a deep breath, then put brain in gear before mouth in motion."

    Being able to talk "with" people, rather than "to" them, will serve you well.

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    1. Those are awesome words to live by. I will try to repeat that to myself until it becomes habit!

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  3. Ashley I think you're gaining extremely valuable experience with those difficult conversations with residents. One of the most difficult (and rewarding)parts of management is dealing with people- and people will come with conflicts of all sorts. The skills you're learning as an RA will translate very closely to the skills needed as a manager. I found this was much more true in an operations role, where staff members had differing opinions on how to best care for a patient. Thankfully, in healthcare most people are passionate about caring for patients. This can lead to disagreements as you noted in your blog, but knowing how to deal with those situations effectively will enable you to be a great leader. Keep up the good work, and keep those residents in line!

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    1. I hope so! I have definitely grown a lot through the RA experience and gained a lot of transferable skills! I can imagine how peoples personal investment in their patients can drive conflict, but at least its coming from a good place! Thanks, Evan!

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